192/365 : to my poetry pen pal part 3

I forgot

Your phone number

For now

My stomach hurts

From the green chili peppers

In the beef stew

(Homemade broth)

I can go so long 

Remembering 

How to avoid the things 

That hurt me

Until I forget again

I liked following the trail

Of faces and sounds with you

It felt kind of scary

And I wanted it to feel 

Sexy or at least sweet

But scary was good because

We still loved each other

In the end

In the during

In the scary

I was afraid to hurt you

When we were rolling around 

Hardwood

I felt like I could break you

Fat kid complex

Maybe also true?

I don't feel free feeling careful

I feel scared

And even still

There's a staying happening

Amidst a hundred tiny riots

And that feels like 

Healing 

Or maybe better--

Like creativity 

When you dance,

You are a firework,

But freer

My face lights up

Nostalgia swarms my heart

I belong face-to-face

With the explosive