Thursday, July 17, 2014

198/365 : The Missed Potential is Maddening


In the spirit of bringing more raw shit to the woo woo nation of my particular Facebook feed:

MISSED POTENTIAL
by Rachael Maddox

It's 9pm in a major American city
I am in a trance-like Pie Bar in a hip area of town
There is a live DJ spinning better-than-disco throw backs 
And it's fucking magical

But somehow, the barista-bar-tender-pie-cutter 
Is paying more attention to the dude who wants to buy $5s of pie
Than the dude (who's her boyfriend) who wants to make out with her

And it makes me think about the movie Amelie
And I must admit, I start idealizing France
Because in my gut, there's this insistence that somewhere, there are people who would never put their loyalties into low wage service
Somewhere, there must be a place where distracted by romance is not a crime 
Where you can kiss with your ass in the face of the customer--
Make them hungry for meaning that fills deeper than pie

But it's 9pm in an American city
In a magical vortex of tunes, pies and booze
And no one is making out 

Instead, the room is full of laptops
Zombies on LAPTOPS

There is a dad-son duo 
And they are bobbing their heads
And we do connect for a moment
About the sparkle in the air
And people scattered everywhere
Neck-curled, hunched, missing it

And then there's me:

I am eating two pieces of pie alone.

The man in line in front of me
Ordered two, looked back and said to me, 
Of course!
Why not?

And I thought
He's right, Why not?
I never eat pie
I am here to eat pie now!
I will have two slices

So I'm in this pool of pietopia potential
Eating two slices of pie alone
My phone is not in my hand
I am taking everything in

The red dressed walls
The neon sign 
The street glow outside
The fat and vibrant DJ
The eye-glazed computer zombies
The pretty girls behind the counter
The zero dancing
The amazing music 
The rising and falling of slow-hum chests

I am secretly wishing everyone had cigarettes 
That the smell was ruining our hair--
Then at least we'd be connected 
By a poison we could see 
Floating between us
Eye to eye
Daring to find 
The pupil

I'm taking everything in, wondering
How it is possible 
That we've erased the temptation for
Real Life Sex
Where is our wild, damnit?
Must I go to the woods?

I am eating my pies
The Flirty Berry is drooling on my tongue
The real-butter crust is massaging my molars
The Peacan goop residue is still on my fingers 
from when I tore the slice apart, scooped the goop,
Recieved it shamelessly in the bed of my mouth--
Really had it like I wanted it

I'm taking everything in 
Through the pores of my skin
Through the hunger of my heart
Through the neon light eternal flicker
Of my techno-grooving soul

There is an every day everywhere 
missed potential to FEEL
And it is driving the wild in me mad

So mad that all I can think is,
I'll have sex with the first person who smashes his laptop here
I swear I will
And I will hold nothing back

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